I think the title of this post says it all. About six months ago, I was starting to get involved with yoga. Immediately I loved it. I had always wanted to try it, but for whatever reason, I never had the courage to do so. I think a lot of it for me was that I was really intimidated, thinking there would be the quintessential-magazine-cover-type yoga experts surrounding every inch of me as they gaze at themselves in the mirror.
Well, there were a few of those, but mostly people like me who were only there to expand their mind; expand their flexibility and peace within their souls. I thought it'd be the ideal recreation for me. I knew I'd never dive into it completely like some, but I was OK with that. I wanted to try it regardless.
When I attended my first yoga class, I loved it, but I could never grasp the whole breathing part of the exercises, and I knew that was a big part of yoga. I didn't care. I just liked being there and I loved the tranquility of the whole experience entirely. Even if I did look like a fool, I didn't care.
After about 3 or 4 months of religiously going to yoga class 2–3 times a week, something odd was starting to grow inside my head. Now before you think the worst, it wasn't a tumor or anything like that. The feelings were excruciating headaches—something I never had to deal with before—well, aside from the morning after a drinking binge in college. Constant headaches that can only be described as blood plumping through my frontal lobe. It was awful. Just bowing my head was a painful experience.
I had never gotten headaches of this magnitude before, so I was scared; I didn't know what to think or what to expect. After a doctor's appointment assuring me that everything was OK, I was still experiencing throbbing headache pain. It was surrounding the entire front part of my head and I didn't know how to make it go away. Frequent pill-popping of Acetaminophen and Ibuprofen didn't help me one bit. It was a waste.
By this time, the idea of going to yoga class was difficult to comprehend. I couldn't imagine bowing my head down for a downward dog posture just to be in piercing pain as I pulled up. My blood pumping throbbing headache was too agonizing to even think of yoga.
The stabbing pain prevented me from my regular yoga visits throughout the week. I thought I finally found something I enjoyed and could dive into. In addition to running three times a week, I felt renewed, only to be let down a few months in.
Although I was able to continue to run early in the mornings, I still couldn't trial the yoga adventure any longer.
I had to stop. I was discouraged.
We never did know what caused these headaches, maybe the medication I was on at the time, but these past few months, my headaches have completely subsided. Maybe here and there I'll get a little headache, but nowhere near as troublesome as before. Am I able to do yoga again? Yeah, why not. Have I done yoga since? No, I haven't.
Why? Good question.
My husband keeps telling me I should go and try it again, but something in my head—no pun intended—tells me not to and I make excuses. Maybe I'm afraid to try it again, I don't know, but I won't know how it turns out until I try it, right? I think I might give it a try again because it's something I loved and enjoyed. Albeit for only a few months, who knows where it could have taken me after all this time. Obviously I'll never know until I completely make that effort once again.
Here we go.
Next week on the calendar I have scheduled my first yoga class in several months. Wish me luck!
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